For this purpose I decided to interview three different people, all of whom had seemingly similar, but at the same time extremely different views on the care of the dead. Person A when asked, wanted to be buried, to keep her body intact after death, incase people really do move on to another life or are reincarnated. However she did express some interest in cremation, because the body can then lie anywhere. She then continued to explain her experience with death, as in funerals and shivas. Shivas she feels remind a person of how great the deceased is, which she finds comforting and nice. The point of these ceremonies in her eyes is to honor the person who has died. When asked what she felt the purpose of embalmers was, her only reply was so that people could study the body in the future, but that she was not really sure. Lastly, tying into this, Person A cares a little about what will happen to her body after death, but she herself does not understand why, as she will be dead.
Person B’s answers varied a bit, starting off with the fact that she wants to be cremated. Through cremation people are able to leave a spiritual part of themselves behind, as opposed to a bodily part, which would be through burial. This she believes will help her be connected to a place, as she finds this to be her new spiritual belief about life after death. Person B’s question about death was how a morgue works, and who invented one in the first place? She also briefly asked how embalming works. So far Person B’s experience with death has been funerals of distant relatives, up until a close friend of hers died unexpectedly last year. The friend had an open casket funeral in a church and she remembers seeing his body thinking, “that’s not really him.” In dealing with this death it was best to be around friends, as opposed to the traditional funeral. She believes that these funerals and cremations exist because of humankind’s fear of what comes after death. Person B believes that instead of having the focus be
what comes after death, funerals should be refocused on the person’s lived life, rather than the religious aspects. Contrary to the belief of Person A, Person B finds that the purpose of embalming is too another way to cling to the life within the deceased. It is a way for people to deal with loss, as the body could just be sleeping.
Lastly Person C added another perspective to the concepts surrounding care of the dead. This person was undecided about burial and cremation. Cremation in her mind has been romanticized by the movies and the media, to make it this grand ordeal of parting with those whom one loves. She finds the idea sweet but unrealistic. However when thinking about burial, her only worry is that there will not be enough room in the ground for everyone to be buried. The cost of both processes also entered her mind, unlike the other two interviewees. Next she questioned the care of the dead, as she herself asked what is more popular, cremation or burial? Is there any maintenance of the bodies after the burial? And what are the downsides of being cremated? All very interesting questions that tend to revolve around the actual transition from life to death. In terms of her own experiences, Person C has been to a few funerals over the past couple of years for distant relatives. Earlier this year she attended one for her great aunt, after which she was allowed to take anything from the house that she wanted. She found it extremely discomforting that she was allowed to just take anything, without a single thought. Like Person B, Person C also thought that the point of these burials and cremations is to make the transition to death less scary, so that people have time to debrief. However she does find the whole thing a bit odd, as all of this care, in the end, does not make much of a difference, the person is still deceased. After death Person C does not care what happens to her body. She will be dead, so she will not know what happens anyway. The care of her body is no longer in her hands, therefore she should not be the one to decide how it happens.
All three of my interviewees had similar opinions to my own and were able to demonstrate the ideas around death in the late teen, early adult age of life. It is apparent that we are indecisive in our options, however that is not to say that we have not given them thought. Person B, the oldest of the group, knew that she wanted to be cremated, but after years of indecisiveness. The other two interviewees and I both felt that they had an idea in mind of what they wanted, however was still vaguely contemplating the other option, as Person A wanted to be buried, but still considered the benefits of cremation. The main issue presented here with burial seems to be that a person is trapped underground, however their body intact. This would of course allow life to be regenerated through the body, a connection to the earth still present. Cremation brought up more thoughts of lying anywhere in the world, being spiritually connected to the earth. In the end it comes down to the type of connection one might want, physical or spiritual.
In terms of experience with care of the dead, all were extremely vague and could provide limited insight. The overall trend appears that it is a sad event, however a bit unreal. Everything that happens, such as the wake, shiva, funeral etc. is focused around the living dealing with the death of the person, rather than celebrating the life the deceased had lived. While Person B it seemed as though all of these things were ways in which people cling to the dead, Person C felt that through the distribution of the deceased’s belongings, the deceased’s life was being erased. The ceremonies in general felt oddly irrelevant to the person’s physical death to Person C, as the events do not change the reality of the death. This is an interesting point; the person is still dead no matter the celebration around their death. Why is it then so important? Everything seems to have solely developed to help the living cope with death. Once the person is dead, as all three of them stated, they do not really care what happens to their bodies afterwards, as it is not their problem, they are dead. But why then is it so important to the living? Is it so they feel that when they themselves die, they will go to a better place?
Sorry for the late post, I didn't have internet until today.
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